I've been doing my personal testing stuff at work, cuz don't have much to do.  My colleagues are pretty busy with the MS project, but there's nothing I can't do at the moment to help them, so I'm just doing my own stuff.  Sometimes, having the leisure to do personal experiment is alot of fun.  I get to try out different stuff, code in a different way, or experiment with different type of modules and putting them to action....so much fun.  And while doing all those stuff, I'm enjoying my favorite white hot chocolate that my colleague treated me, although I can't taste it fully (cuz my upper palatal is numb), I can still taste it with my tongue and its pretty yummy yummy!

Today, J was so nice to drop me off to work, and I got here at 9:40am,.....haha, that's really really early for me!,...this rarely happens, but it's been happening since I got back to work after my 2 weeks off.  I've been waking up quite early lately, mostly because I know I have to eat breakfast at home and can't have it togo on the run, therefore even waking up early doesn't help me to get to work early.  

My face's feelings are so weird.  For a min, I feel itchyness, then I try to scratch it, then I realize that part is still numb,...then where's the itchyness coming from??? And worst of all, I can't stop it, it keeps bothering me.

I can't hold this anymore and need to get it out somehow.  A friend of mine is quitting her job and tomorrow will be her last day.  She's been sending me sms stating how she doesn't like to train the new girl, and how slow she is and how annoying she is blah blah blah.....ok, she might be slow, annoying, etc etc, but she's still human, there's no way we can expect the entire world to be the same like us, no way.  We are all different, and God made us like that, unique.  She's been always saying how she used all her patience on me, and all the tolerance and caring on me etc., don't get me wrong, I REALLY REALLY appreciate that, and really thank God to have put her on my way when I needed her, but I just hope she can be like that, not exactly, but at least close to that to others.  Yes, I might understand, I've known her longer, therefore she's caring so much for me, but shouldn't we care for others as well, at least care for their feelings, cuz who knows, maybe some day in the future, we might need their help, whatever goes around comes around....well, I tried my best to tell her this, but she doesn't want to listen, and keeps complaining and complaing...so I'm finally tired, and just told her to stop training her, I mean, if she's so annoying to her and bothers her so much, just stop training her, and that'll solve the problem, then she tells me that her boss is standing beside her, then I told her, if tomorrow is your last day, what the hell do you care anymore?  Either just do what you need to (since you still get paid) or just do anything you like(stop training her), but stop complaining about others, that girl doesn't want to be slow, she wants to be smart and fast and be the best, that's why she's trying........sigh!!!!!!!  Some people just get to my nerves! Unbelievable!  I've never ever complain another coworker like that.  If there's someone I don't like(which rarely or never has happened before), I would just talk to that person less.  Why do I have to complain about him/her?  Its just a job, if you are not satisfied with it, quit and find another one.  If you need the $$, then just do your best, and ignore others.  Sigh!, maybe I'm just to stupid to understand that.

Yesterday was my first day back to work.  Everything was pretty ok except that I get tired pretty quickly....and my mind was pretty slow....but over all ok.  All my colleagues are soooo nice, considerate and caring, they are the best! Thank you! J was very good too!  He dropped me off at work....so nice of him.  He's been very nice lately.  He went shopping with me at Farview Mall on monday and paid for all my stuff cuz he knows I was quite upset and bored at home, and he wanted to cheer me up....you know, the only thing that most likely can cheer a girl up is by shopping lor....sometimes it takes something like this(surgery/sickness) to realize how much someone cares for you.  I'm glad I'm finally back to work and things are getting back to normal, hopefully in 4 more weeks,...3.5 more weeks till my bands are off and I can have some real food yay!

People here are pretty busy and I kinda feel guilty for not being able to help.  Senior is on vacation and I have nothing assigned prior my sick leave, therefore leaving me here with nothing much to do.

I finally got my GTI, yay! It's absolutely amazing! It's gorgeous!  Love that car. 

Name: Angel

DOB: Aug 24, 2009

Details: 2009 white GTI 200hp 2.0T w/ Luxury Sport Ppackage, tinted windows, 18" Alloy Wheels Package

My car is the only happy thing in the last 2.5 weeks....and it's the only thing that had actually cheered me up.  Its my angel!

Lately, I've been having this small thought.  I used to think that fate is already stated when you are borned; carved in stone.  Now I kinda realize that's not true.  We create our own path.  Its just a matter of decision making.  Every decision you make, changes your path which in turn, changes your fate.  The problem is, we as human beings (most, not all) don't like changes.  We are used to our environment as it is and feel comfortable and don't want to make any changes.  This is kinda of sad, because I believe that we need to be innovative in order to advance.  The world is always changing therefore we should be adaptive and change accordingly.  Luck is a bonus.  It's a shortcut.  Is good to have, yet equally good to not have, as it makes you work harder to attain your goal.

After all the things I've gone through, I still consider myself very very lucky.  Yes, I've gone through alot, at the same time, all these incidents in my life changed my perspective towards life.  It helped me grow, mature, appreciate life, appreciate my friends, appreciate my love ones and just learn that nothing is for granted in life.  I am very blessed to have gone thru all that, because God gave me all those challenges to transform me into the Vicky you know today.  I'm far from perfect.  I have very bad temper, and  very low EQ but I still feel blessed because I could be worst than this. I don't have too many friends, but just couple that are always there when I need them.  That's a huge blessing.  I got parents and siblings that love and care for me.  I got J, who's not romantic nor know the best way to make me happy or entertain me, but he's a sincere, loving and caring when I need him.  I got a job of my dream.  Yes, I love my job. I love this company and love my colleagues, they are so caring, encouraging and considerate.  What else can I ask, aside from a raise? LOL....it takes so much to find a job that you like and are willing to do it for the next 5, 10, 20 years.  I own a condominium, it's not the highest class, but it's decent enough.  I got the car that I really, in the way I wanted it (white with tinted windows).  I'm back to school, which is a super bonus.  Never thought I would make it back to school after being working ft for over 3 years.  Counting my bad experiences vs my blessings, oh boy, I can see my blessings always always outrun the bad things.  Life is like that.  We tend to forget about our blessings and only remember the bad experiences.  In fact, when something bad happens, the only thing we know is complain.  We have to know life is a circle.  We need to have bad moments in order to appreciate and enjoy happy ones.  Remember, when you are in a bad, upset situation, just remember, it'll be over pretty soon, just try your best to overcome it and happy moments will arrive pretty soon.  Never give up, just need to overcome and let it go and await for a better day.

"I never think of the future. It comes soon enough." Albert Einstein

Seven days, exactly a week post op!  How do I feel?  How should I feel?  Bored, anxious, hungry, useless, lazy, tired...just not knowing what exactly I want at this moment.  Every part below my eyes are numb and swollen and bruises around my face.  Stop the antibiotics on Sat and the swelling doesn't seem to come down, but I really can't help it,  that antibiotic is awful, I puke every time I take it.   Consulted my surgeon and she said it should be ok since I've had antibiotics thru IV in the hospital for 5 days.  Sigh, can't wait to get back to normal, and I really mean normal.  I still have one more week till going back to work, sigh, what should I be doing this week?  I've been just on bed almost 23 out 24 hrs a day, and my back has started to bother me.  I'm hungry and very anxious for food but my teeth are very heavily banded, I can only drink liquid thru a syringe.  I need to wait 5 more weeks till I can have some solid food :(  I got cravings for everything.  I miss my cooking. I got cravings for wings, egg, veggies, noodles.....omg, even rice.  I hate congee, but I'll have to be on it till week 6, sigh, and I'm only starting week 2 :(  Every night, my dreams are all about food, and more food, when can I have real food :'(

Yesterday, I was going thru my voicemails, and found out that my best friend's cat, "Moon",  just die.  Omg, so soon?  I was living with my friend when she got Moon, and now she's gone.  I feel so sad, I know my friend must be very sad too; worst of all, I can't talk therefore I can't call her to talk to her.  I hope she's feeling better soon.

After couple tries of restoring my EeePC from a USB, I finally succeed today!  I have a 1000h EeePC that doesn't come with a cd-rom; it only has usb ports, therefore I had to make a bootable USB and copy the image from the original DVD to the USB and use it to restore to factory default.  The process was super simple, but I don't know why it took me so long....yeah, rewally long, it took me couple months till its finally completed today.....you can tell how lazy I am :p

Good news, my friend who was unemployed, finally found a job.  I got the news while in the hospital, so happy for her.  She's very dedicated to her work, I knew she can find one pretty soon.  I feel kinda bad, cuz I promised her that I will create her online portfolio, but I was so swamped with work and school, then surgery, didn't have time to even started.  When I finsihed school, the first thing was to offer her to start up her site, but didn't hear back from her, then went to surgery.  I'm glad she found a job otherwise I'll feel so guilty.  I hope she found a good company and is happy working there.

This past week, was so far..... really.... the worst experience ever in my life, but as ALWAYS, out of bad experiences you discover. I've had lots of nausea and pain and swelling....really really bad...still not sure if I should regret proceeding with ther surgery?  well, its too late to say that, since its already done, and cannot be reverved...well, it could, but you know what I mean.  Like usual, my best buddies.....hahaha, they are the best!.... are always there, caring for me, cooking for me and trying to make my days past by fast,......always always so attentive and caring, I don't know how I would have survived without them.  The hospital where I had the surgery is in Etobicoke, and neither of them drive.....they had to commute for a good 2 hours to see me and yet, they are there almost every day....they actually rotate to be there with me, always caring for me,  I donno how can I survive without these 2 gals.  Thank you thank you so much God for putting these two angels there for me.  J was the third one and the most important one. as he provided me with physical and emotional support.  Thank you everyone.

I'm thinking...I have gone thru so much sadness in my life...my parents, my mom's sickness, my family-less life in Toronto, financial issues, accidents, betrayals, I'm still here...the sky is still very light, very blue...full of hope, life is still full of blessings....and full of love....surprises, it makes me look forward to a better and better tomorrow. I missed my parents! my siblings!

Also miss my hot shower....haha...later!

24 more  hours to go....this period of time is the worst; I know what to expect but not completely ready.  I don't think I'll ever be 100% ready.  Very nervous, tense and yet very excited.  I've been having these feelings these last couple days; the sky seems to know my feelings; storms and rain when I'm down and sunny when I'm up LOL  my feelings got reflected on the weather   I just  hope everything goes well and smoothly.  The clock is tickly